


Lights Down Low

by livingforamiracle



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A lot of it starting out, Angst, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 14:54:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15145586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livingforamiracle/pseuds/livingforamiracle
Summary: The war is over and the people of the Wizarding World are slowly starting to repair their lives. Loved ones who have died are dearly missed and many others still hold anger in their hearts. This is a story about two boys, who most people would describe as opposite sides of a coin, who find out that they are a lot more similar than they think.There is hatred, love, violence and heartbreak embedded into this story, and the journey these boys take is one that defies all odds but gives hope to those who are willing to witness it.





	1. The Beginning of the Aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! I've been a part of the Drarry fandom for a long time now and recently inspiration struck which cultivated in me beginning to write this fic. I know that a lot of these Draco & Harry stories tend to all blend together and sometimes seem similar or even vastly different but please give this fic a chance, that's all I can ask.
> 
> Feel free to leave any comments about what you think so far, or even suggestions of what you would like to see as the story progresses. Thank you so much and I hope you all enjoy reading this.
> 
> So much love to all of you!!

Draco had spent more time than he could possibly recount trying to repent for all of the mistakes he had made.

The Dark Lord had been defeated for some time now and most of those who had missed or chosen not to pursue their last year of education at Hogwarts had decided to come back.

He knew that a lot of the decisions he had made were in most part because of the familial pressures he felt on a daily basis.

It was at this point in his life where he could admit that he had too easily let himself fall into the discriminating and ruthless pureblood mindset that had been bestowed in from birth, and though it was no excuse for his actions, he now knows that he was wrong.

A month into the school year had already flown by, and life seemed so bleak, so dark and gloomy for Draco, as if the Dark Lord still had a hold on his soul.

And maybe that’s just what it was.

Even with his demise, the Dark Lord had found a way to ruin Draco’s life by the association he had to being a _Death Eater_ , something he will never forgive himself for becoming.

Because no one believes him when he says that he was forced into it, that though he wanted to prove himself, in time he realized it had been the wrong decision.

He had never gotten along with The Boy Who Lived, and was sure that he never would, but for the first time in his life, Draco was beyond grateful for that speckled git and his heroism.

If he were being honest, Draco was sure that his fate was sealed when the Ministry trials came around, but then in came Potter being his knight in shining armor (something he hates to admit he needed), finding a way to get his family from having to spend the rest of their lives in Azkaban.

Though Lucius had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that Potter had come to their rescue, Narcissa had acquired a newfound respect for him that was both intriguing and devastating to Draco.

His mother had always shunned Potter but now that all had been said and done she spoke of him in a warm tone which greatly unsettled him.

Narcissa had always loved and supported Draco, through his most wonderful and difficult times, but with Potter swooping in to save the day he could not help but feel like he was a failure of a son; unworthy of his mother’s love and ashamed at all the horrible things he had done.

These feelings only grew worse as he had decided to come back to school, thoroughly cementing his place as a traitor among his peers.

 _Go fuck yourself Death Eater, no one wants you around,_ said a Hufflepuff 5th year who would normally have cowered at Draco’s feet if the situation was reversed.

 _Who let scum like you back into this school? After everything you have done, the Dementor’s kiss would have been_ _too easy,_ had said a Gryffindor 6 th year as he drove his foot into Draco’s ribs repeatedly.

Similar comments had been made about and to him since they’d all come back; he’d taken them in stride because he knew that they all had a right to feel the way they did.

That’s why he never fought back.

Ever.

It wasn’t until he overheard his ‘friends’ from Slytherin badmouthing him that Draco finally broke.

These people, the ones he had spent his entire life with, had all decided to turn their backs on him. He had not one friend, let alone an ally, left at Hogwarts and the more the realization hit Draco, the more he began to spiral.

Gone was the haughty pureblood attitude that Draco had worn with such pride. What was left behind was even worse; a broken and lonely skeleton of a human being. He rarely ate anything during meals, choosing to hide away in the solitary room McGonagall had provided him (for his safety), than to face the mass of Hogwarts all in one place.  

Draco would only leave his quarters for class and would remain silent throughout the entirety of the lecture as to not draw attention to himself, as if anyone would converse with him anyway.

Slowly the isolation began to eat away at his soul, a sense of depression settled into his bones but he tried to fight it as best as he could.

The only solace he found was when he would be able to leave Hogwarts’ grounds and go visit his parents; his mother’s arms always open in a warm embrace and even his father giving him a soft pat on the back in apology would give him temporary relief.

He had considered self-harm, even treaded into darker thoughts of suicide only to be pulled away from the knowledge of how it would devastate his parents. Though they had their faults, he could never cause his parents pain, no matter how much he needed to release his own.

Days flew by as the school year trudged on, and Draco Malfoy felt invisible to the world. Though he was the center of ridicule of most of Hogwarts, he found a way to keep his distance from everything and everyone as best as he could.

By doing this, Draco failed to notice a pair of emerald green eyes watching him, not in loathing, not in anger, not even in pity, but in absolute devastation.


	2. The Boy Who Lived Twice

Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived Twice, was crowned a Hero, the Savior of the Wizarding World, and many other names that he had lost track of.

Don’t get him wrong, he was happy and relieved that Voldemort had met is timely death and had been thoroughly vanquished, but all he wanted to do now was rest.

He was beyond proud of all that he and every single person on the side of good had accomplished but he was _tired_ , of all the expectations and questions and people throwing themselves at him because he rid the world of a great evil.

It seemed like all of these people forgot that Harry is just an 18 year old, someone who has lived through horrors that no child should have to, and is just trying to find his bearings in a world where he no longer has to act on the name of The Chosen One.

In the past 18 years of his life, he has been beaten down, nearly killed, tortured and even shunned but none of that compares to the love he has been given, the compassion and warmth he had been looking for ever since his parents had been killed.

But a hero can only be one for so long before he gets tired and needs a break, something no one seems to understand because of all the bloody _expectations_ that the savior of the wizarding world has to hold heavily on his shoulders.

He’s still just a teenager for heaven’s sake!

But that argument does not seem to fly well with those who are looking to him for inspiration, for a way to move forward from all the loss and bloodshed they’ve faced. Harry wants nothing more than to put the past behind him and help build a stronger and happier world for wizards of all kind but he has barely lived his life enough to know what to do.

And now that he had decided (more like coerced by Hermione) to come back and complete his Hogwarts education, the attention seems to have grown tremendously and there are times that Harry finds it extremely hard to breathe.

He steals away a lot of silent and solitary moments, whenever he can, because sometimes he needs to just have some time to think, to _feel_ , without the fear and despair of the future hanging over his head.

Hermione says she understands, but Harry knows she’s worried sick at all the times he’s absent from meals or when he sleeps in a little too late. But she also seems satisfied when Harry is smiling and laughing with all of their friends whether it’s in the common room or at the Three Broomsticks as they spend some time catching up and allowing themselves to live a little. She’s been his sister for longer than he can even realize, and to have her love and concern is something he cherishes because if it weren’t for Hermione, Harry doesn’t know where he would be.

Harry is thankful that Ron is so caught up in his newfound romance with Hermione that he has become oblivious to how the smile on Harry’s face falls dramatically when they are away from the public eye. Though Ron catches on to Harry’s gloomy mood at times, he’s learned to just let it go because when Harry is ready to talk to him about it, he will. It’s one of the reasons as to why Harry loves and appreciates Ron as his best friend and brother.

And that’s the thing, Harry tries so hard to put a smile on for the world, to be happy like he wants and is expected to be but it’s just so damn _hard._ They’ve all lost so much and he still can’t help but feel like a lot of that is his fault. His parents, Sirius, Remus and Tonks and the countless others who lost their lives in the battle against Voldemort for all these years are a stark reminder of how many times his life has turned upside down, that loss is something he will always have to deal with. He never wanted any of them to die, especially for him, and yet they’re all gone and it gets more difficult to deal with as the days go by.

That feeling of despair, of knowing that things can’t change now continues to take a toll on Harry, because why can’t he just be strong and deal with it? Why can’t he just learn to handle the pain and go on with his life and help fix the wizarding world like everyone says he can?

He has wonderful friends, an adoptive family and a world full of people who love him so why can’t he bask in that feeling and move on?

These questions are what keep Harry up at night, causing him to roam the castle in the darkness under his invisibility to cloak, because old habits die hard and all that. He keeps thinking and thinking, but those thoughts never reach a conclusion but only inspire a whole other batch of things that he does not know how to handle.

Harry has talked to Hermione about it before, and she says he may have PTSD, which is common in war heroes after they’ve faced too many traumas and are still trying to come to terms with everything. She reminds him that everyone who loves him is there to support him, that just because he is feeling this way doesn’t mean that anything is wrong but that he just needs time.

Even now, Harry doesn’t know what he would do without Hermione; always saying what he needs to hear and being a comfort in his time of need.

He knows, hell he more than understands that Ginny should be that comfort for him but something has changed. Their dynamic has gone through twists and turns and though they love each other so much, things are not the same.

They’d had this conversation during the summer, a few days before Harry’s 18th birthday actually, on how it is pretty evident that the two people who went headfirst into their relationship are not the same two people who are in it now. They’d both gone through too much to stay their young and blissful selves, giving way to them becoming the matured and slightly hard individuals they are now.

But one thing they knew was certain, that love that had consumed them before was still there, though not burning as brightly as before but still there, so they decided to try and make it work, to give each other a few months to see if the dynamic would fit once again.

And now that it has been a few months, Harry realizes that their relationship never really picked up from where it left off but actually turned into a beautiful friendship where kissing and shagging was involved sometimes. But even now, Harry can’t remember the last time he looked at Ginny the way he used to, and instead has been viewing her as a strong, fiery and beautiful free spirit who does not really need a man to be the woman she is becoming.

He’s sitting by the common room fire when Ginny comes in without her friends and looking exhausted from a night spent in the library, so Harry calls her over so they can talk, “Hi Ginny.”

At the sound of her name Ginny looks up and smiles, “Hi Harry.”

Harry sits up so that he can make room for Ginny on the couch as she walks over, “Come sit. How was the library?”

Ginny all put collapses onto the coach, her feet resting on the coffee table as she closes her eyes and tilts her head back, “Horrible as usual. I honestly don’t remember a time where I came back from there before 11 anymore.”

Harry looks at her closely, sees the crease in her brow and the dark circles under her eyes and almost convinces himself that they can talk another time before Ginny interrupts his thoughts, her eyes having opened and become focused on his face.

“Harry what’s wrong? Something seems to be bothering you right now.”

Huffing out a breath, Harry almost chuckles at how well Ginny knows him and that this should make him happy but it only strengthens his resolve to say what he can’t hold in any longer, “We need to talk. About us. I know you’re tired and I’m so sorry but I just need to -- “

He’s cut off by Ginny’s hand curling around his wrist and saying, “Harry please don’t apologize to me and start freaking out. Talk to me, please.”

Harry smiles weakly at her before resting his other hand on Ginny’s that is still wrapped around his wrist, giving himself a minute before he begins to talk, “I love you, I have for so long and probably always will. But the truth is, I’ve noticed the way we’ve been these past few months after our talk and I can’t help but notice that we haven’t acted like a couple in so long. Yeah we kiss and shag from time to time but I think you can even tell that things just haven’t been the same. Don’t get me wrong, in that time you’ve become one of my best friends, someone I know I can tell anything to, but I just don’t know if continuing to try and make this work is good for either one of us.”

He finishes his monologue, looking down into his lap and taking a deep breath, waiting for Ginny to say something but he’s only met with silence.

Steeling himself to expect the worse Harry looks up and is surprised to see a soft smile spread across Ginny’s face and he feels a warmth sear through his body at the sight of it.

As if reading his mind, Ginny’s smile grows wider and she begins to laugh, “Oh Harry, you shouldn’t have been so nervous to talk to me about this. Truth is, I completely understand.” She tilts her head to the side and looks at him fondly before continuing, “I know you were trying to spare my feelings but truth is you’re right. I have, do and probably always will love you too but it’s like you said, you’ve become my best friend in this time as well and I don’t want to ruin that by us trying to force a relationship that maybe just isn’t meant to be. So I agree, I think it’s time we end this and let our friendship grow instead. I think we’ll both be happier then.”

Harry almost doesn’t let her finish speaking before he’s grabbing her up into a tight hug, pouring out all of the love and gratitude he feels towards her for understanding and being the amazing woman she is, “Thank you Ginny, thank you so much.”

They pull away from their embrace smiling at each other before Harry presses a kiss to her forehead and stands up, “Off to bed with you then. You look like you’re about to knock out right there.”

Ginny laughs before following Harry to the winding staircases, turning to give him a bright smile that lights up her tired face, “Good night Harry. Thank you for being you.”

Harry smiles and nods in response before they both turn away from each other and go to their separate rooms.

Feeling lighter than he has in a while, Harry walks into the room he shares with the same four boys that he began his Hogwarts journey with and sees that Ron is still up reading a book in bed. The positive influence Hermione has on him is a beautiful and crazy thing but Harry is glad to see it.

Ron looks up at the sound of the door opening and smiles when he sees Harry walking in, “Hey mate.”

Harry grins back as he undresses and gets ready for bed, “How’s the book going?”

Ron turns slightly red before responding, “Pretty good. I don’t understand a lot of the Muggle references but it’s not too bad considering.”

As Harry gets situated in bed and Ron decides to call it a night as well, the latter voices his observation on the former’s cheery behavior, “Not that it’s a bad thing mate but you seem to be in an awfully good mood. What’s up?”

Before Ron can jump to any conclusions on what he’d been doing, Harry opens up about his talk with Ginny, starting from their conversation over the summer to the one that had just ended 10 minutes prior because though Ron is Harry’s best mate, he’s Ginny’s brother as well and deserves to know the whole truth.

Harry’s not too sure on how Ron will react but he knows he should give his best friend enough credit because he’d grown up a lot in the past year and could handle these emotional situations better than ever before.

After a moment of silence Ron opens his mouth to reply and what he says warms Harry’s heart all over again.

Ron fixes Harry with a pointed look but his smile outweighs the seriousness of it, “Look mate, I’m not going to lie and say that I haven’t noticed that things were off between you and Gin but I also knew it was something you guys had to figure out on your own. Plus I knew that if needed you would come talk to me or even Hermione so I wasn’t worried. I’m just happy that you both are happy. That’s what matters to me in the end.”

Harry smiles at Ron, gratitude written all over his face before sleep overtakes him and he’s pulled into a dream lighter than he’s had in ages.


	3. The Ability of Redemption

That feeling of relief, of being at peace evaporated a little too fast for Harry’s liking. Stepping out of the Gryffindor dormitory and into the bustling world of Hogwarts reminded Harry that there were expectations awaiting him as well as fellow students turned fans surrounding him 24/7.

All of that became white noise to him when his eyes would catch a silvery blonde head ducking between people in the crowd, the unmistakable trademark of Draco Malfoy pulling at Harry’s attention like it always had.

But now, things were different.

There was a time that seeing Malfoy would irritate the hell out of Harry more times than not but lately he caught himself looking for the blonde whenever he could.

He was worried, as crazy as that sounds, because Malfoy did not look okay and though they had their differences Harry couldn’t help but feel devastated for him.

Draco Malfoy was a shell of his former self. He was quiet, withdrawn and lonely, looking almost sickly as if he hadn’t been eating in a while.

That last observation rang true to Harry when he started to realize that Draco was never present for a single meal in the Great Hall.

It had been a few weeks since Harry’s attention had become transfixed on Draco again. Every time Harry tried to catch Draco’s eyes amongst the mass of people around them, the latter would shrink into himself before practically running away.

The look on Draco’s face with his following actions sprung up a red flag in Harry’s mind because that definitely meant something was wrong; that if Draco Malfoy could look so wounded, so beaten down to the point that life was taking its toll on him, then Harry had no reason to feel as sorry for himself as he did.

He could only have guessed how Draco would be treated when he’d learned that the blonde would be returning to finish up his education. And he is ashamed to admit that he, like most people, was not happy that Draco would be returning, regardless of him pleading for the Malfoy family to be acquitted of all the crimes they committed. He had wanted the family to be spared because he knew it was the right thing to do, but not because he was harboring any warm and fuzzy feelings for any one of them.

But now, all Harry could think about was Draco’s suffering. Because yeah, the two of them had always been at each other’s throats but now that the war was over, now that Harry could truthfully say that Draco had picked the side of good in the end, he wanted to help Malfoy.

Harry has always believed that people deserve a second chance, no matter how many wrongs they have committed, because if that individual is capable of repenting their mistakes and trying to better themselves, then they deserve the ability to prove themselves.

And if Harry was being honest, he could see that Draco was trying.

He could see that Draco was keeping his distance, that he was being respectful of those around him in a way he never had before.

But what stuck with Harry the most was that Draco never tried to defend himself when people threw insults his way and treated him like shit.

That was the sign of a completely broken man in Harry’s eyes, because the Draco Malfoy he knew would never back down from a fight but now, that’s all he did.

He couldn’t stand to see that anymore, not when Harry knew he could try to help and make things better for Malfoy. Yeah he could verbally chastise anyone who decided to hurt Draco but he knew that the blonde would not like that one bit, no matter how much pain he may be in.

For the entirety of the day, Harry wracked his brain for a way to make a difference, to show his support to Draco without pushing him further away.

Hermione and Ron could tell that something was off, because though Harry had a tendency to be a lot more quiet these days, his silence spoke a lot louder than words ever could.

But having known Harry for as long as they did, the couple knew that when he was ready to talk he would, and so they trusted whatever was going on in his brain.

It only took a few hours for Hermione to catch on to Harry’s thoughts, not that he was doing a good job of hiding them anyway.

She had noticed the way Harry stared at Malfoy throughout their shared classes for years now, but today the despair on Harry’s face whenever he glanced over at the Slytherin told Hermione everything she needed to know.

Hermione couldn’t lie to herself and say that she didn’t understand Harry’s sentiments towards Draco. Even she had noticed how withdrawn Malfoy had become in the past month.

He was not the same guy who used to torment her every chance he got.

Draco had become a lot more respectful towards her, whether they were in class or even studying in the library. Any time their eyes would meet, Draco would nod at her in acknowledgement and go about his own business, something Hermione thought would never be possible in the years that she had known him.

She felt like she was getting ahead of herself when she thought this, but a huge part of her wanted to befriend Draco, and if not her just yet, she knew Harry would be the perfect candidate.

With his big heart and resilient mind, Hermione knew that Harry would be the best kind of support that Draco needed right now.

And if Harry was too scared to make that first move, then Hermione would be right there by his side to make sure it happened.


	4. Change

It was nearing the end of the day and while Draco would usually retire to his solitary room by now, his stomach began to growl uncontrollably signaling his hunger had to be alleviated very soon.

He knew that there was no chance in hell that he could walk into the Great Hall to get some food and so he walked down the familiar path to the kitchens to grab a quick snack before the house-elves retired for the night.

Though it had taken some time for them to accept Draco into their territory, the house-elves slowly began to warm up to him when they noticed he meant them no harm and was actually apologetic for all he had done wrong in the past.

Walking in, a swarm of the tiny but caring creatures surrounded him, questioning him about his day and asking what he would like to eat.

The house-elves were the only ones who seemed to worry about his well-being and he could not have been more thankful. Draco had realized his prejudice against them had been unsound and he knew that he had a lot to make up for but he was more than ready to do it.

After being served some delicious sandwiches and rice pudding, Draco bid the house-elves farewell before making the journey back to his rooms as quietly as he could, seeing as dinner had probably just ended in the Great Hall.

Luck seemed to not be on his side because as Draco rounded a corner not even 100 feet from his room, he saw a small group of Gryffindors and Ravenclaws walking towards him.

Before he could turn around and make a run for it, someone had already sent a Petrificus Totalus his way and he was falling and falling until his head made a sickening thud with the ground.

“You can’t run away from us Malfoy, no matter how hard you try,” said the voice of a 4th year Ravenclaw as she walked into Draco’s line of sight.

Laughter erupted amongst the group of people that slowly began to surround him, their faces contorted with malice as if they were predators stalking their prey.

Draco couldn’t help but see the irony in that because only a year ago the roles had been reversed in his favor.

But now, Draco was used to this change of events that had begun to stack up against him and he waited in horrified anticipation for them to attack. In the end he knew that he deserved this abuse, no matter how brutal it gradually became.

He could only pray that he had the strength to make it through it all.

_Scum._

_Death Eater._

_Traitor._

_Spineless._

_Coward._

_Bastard._

Every word spat at him was punctuated with a blow, and the list kept going on until Draco couldn’t stand it anymore.

As each kick from his assailant connected with different parts of his body, the pain began to overpower his consciousness as stars began to appear in front of his eyes.

 _Please just take me already_ , was the thought that kept repeating in Draco’s head the longer his classmates hurt him, _I can’t take much more of this pain if it keeps coming_ being added on as he began to close his eyes for the impending blackout.

As if from a dream, Draco heard a voice yell before the sound of people running away rocked against his ear drums and _wait did he recognize that voice, no it couldn’t be, there was no way **he** would be here stopping people from hurting Draco._

He felt warm hands shake his shoulders, fingers on one hand going to check his pulse while the other undid the body binding curse.

From what felt like ages but was only seconds, the pain began to diminish while Draco slowly came back to consciousness.

And as tortured grey eyes opened and connected with concerned emerald green ones, Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter knew that things would never be the same from this moment onwards.


End file.
